What I Want for Christmas

Here are some items I would like for Christmas:

A life-sized Abominal Snowman Yeti statue to serve as a stunning conversation piece that will greet guests at our front door:

Abominal Snowman

Abominal Snowman

A Zombie of Montclaire Moors figurine to tastefully augment Melissa’s beautiful front flower garden:

Zombie

Zombie

A dozen pierogi ornaments to accompany Darth Vader, the Leg Lamp, and my dirty sock on our festive Christmas Tree:

Pierogi

Pierogi

Two 6-foot Mademoiselle Haute Couture Floor Lamp statues to brighten the natural wood highlights in our mid-tone living room:

Lamp

Lamp

Where can someone find all these amazing items in one place, you ask? The United Airlines SkyMall. Hurry while quantities last…
 

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